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Wednesday, October 16th 2013

22:10

The Christian Aspie Blog has Moved!

I have moved The Christian Aspie Blog to an easier to manage, more affordable site. You can visit it at http://thechristianaspie.wordpress.com/

Of course, the website http://TheChristianAspie.com can direct you there as well.

See you there!
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Thursday, October 10th 2013

9:33

Who comes first? And second, and third...

  • Mood: Happy

I see a lot of people who seem somewhat confused by the order of priorities in their life, marriage and family.

A few years ago, before I married my husband, I was drawn into a discussion with a man. He asked me, “Does God want us to love Him more or does He want us to love the people more.”

I answered that God wants us to love Him more, then people second. The man flipped out and over the next two days bombed my email with a barrage of ‘evidence’ supporting his stance that God wants us to love the people first.

He was so very, very wrong but refused to accept scripture supporting that he was wrong that that God wants us to love Him first. He finally resorted to name calling and personal attacks. It was then that I realized that he was not accepting and would never accept the Biblical evidence I provided that showed we are to love God first. He did not want to know the truth; he just wanted me to agree with him and not challenge his opinion – which I might add was inaccurate.

The truth is, Matthew 6:33 clearly says that we are to first seek the Kingdom of God. But if we look a little further, to Matthew 22:36-40, the question is very plainly answered.

36 “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”

37 Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ 40 All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”

 

Hmmm, it is pretty clear to me that we are to love God first.

 

From there, though, many people are confused. It makes sense because the Bible does not lay out a structure of priorities. However, when we study the scripture, we can see it quite clearly.

 

Ephesians 5 gives us a pretty clear picture of what our priorities should be. Ephesians 5:25 says that a husband should love his wife the way Christ loved the church. Well, when we look at where Christ placed the church in His priorities we can see that it had the highest place after God. Wives are commanded in Ephesians 5:22 to submit to their husbands as to the Lord.

 

Children come from that union of husband and wife; they are next in the line of priorities.

 

So, within the family structure, we are to love God first and foremost, our spouse second and our children third. This is God’s order, how He intended the family structure to be.

 

Now, we are also commended to honor our father and mother (Deuteronomy 5:16), our extended family (1 Timothy 5: , our church family or fellow believers (most of 1 Corinthians, Romans 14:10, Galatians 5:13, Ephesians 4:32, 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Hebrews 10:24).

 

Finally, we see in Matthew 28:19 that we are to love everyone else, bringing the gospel to the lost, making them disciples of Christ and baptizing them in His name (Jesus name) – populating the Kingdom.

 

I hope this clears up any confusion that some of you may have had on this topic. I would love to hear your thoughts on this and if you have more supporting scripture please share.

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Monday, October 7th 2013

9:44

Is Baptism necessary for salvation?

  • Mood: Saved!
Recently I was on a forum, involved in a discussion regarding the necessity of water baptism for salvation. Some said yes, some said no and some had no opinion whatsoever. I chimed in and in true Aspie form, proclaimed boldly what I know to be true because scripture tells us water baptism is necessary. Of course, most, if not all, in the forum are NTs and they do not appreciate the boldness of Aspies. As usual, I received quite a bit of email and some nasty comments.

But I KNOW truth. I know for a fact what the Bible says. As a Spirit Filled Christian, a Christian who has been baptized in water AND spirit, I know what scripture tells us is necessary for salvation. I will outline it here in case you want to know the truth of the Bible as well.

Please, though, before you try to argue against what scripture tells us, please read this ENTIRE post. It has been my experience that many people will read only a portion of a post then go on the attack. I ask that you do not do that here. I have provided more than adequate scripture to support the Truth that water baptism is required for salvation. And if you have not been baptized in Jesus' name, please, please find a Jesus name baptized, Holy Ghost filled person to baptize you the correct way. It is very important.

So, is water baptism necessary for salvation?

Yes, the Bible clearly tells us that water baptism by immersion in the name of Jesus is required for salvation as is baptism in the Holy Spirit.

Please note that by baptism I mean by immersion in water in the Name of Jesus for the remission of sins -  NOT under titles. Luke 24:47 says that repentance and remission of sins should be preached in His name. Water baptism in Jesus' name is for the remission of sins.

We see quite a few scripture where salvation and baptism are referenced together. Mark 16:16, He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

Acts 2:38 lays out the Apostles doctrine for salvation: Repent, and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins, and ye shall receive the gift of the Holy Ghost.

Romans 6:1-4
What shall we say then? Shall we continue in sin, that grace may abound?
2 God forbid. How shall we, that are dead to sin, live any longer therein?
3 Know ye not, that so many of us as were baptized into Jesus Christ were baptized into his death?
4 Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.

Baptism saves us.
1 Peter 3:21
The like figure whereunto even baptism doth also now save us (not the putting away of the filth of the flesh, but the answer of a good conscience toward God,) by the resurrection of Jesus Christ

Faith alone is not enough.
James 2:24
Ye see then how that by works a man is justified, and not by faith only.

Acts 22:15
And now why tarriest thou? arise, and be baptized, and wash away thy sins, calling on the name of the Lord.

Paul also stressed the importance of water baptism in Jesus' name.
Acts 19:1-6
And it came to pass, that, while Apollos was at Corinth, Paul having passed through the upper coasts came to Ephesus: and finding certain disciples,

2 He said unto them, Have ye received the Holy Ghost since ye believed? And they said unto him, We have not so much as heard whether there be any Holy Ghost.

3 And he said unto them, Unto what then were ye baptized? And they said, Unto John's baptism.

4 Then said Paul, John verily baptized with the baptism of repentance, saying unto the people, that they should believe on him which should come after him, that is, on Christ Jesus.

5 When they heard this, they were baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus.

6 And when Paul had laid his hands upon them, the Holy Ghost came on them; and they spake with tongues, and prophesied.

In Acts 10 we read of the story of Cornelius. When Peter witnessed to him all who heard the word received the Holy Ghost. At that time Peter COMMANDED that they be baptized. He did not ask or encourage or recommend, he COMMANDED. That is strong evidence that baptism is necessary for salvation.
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Friday, August 9th 2013

20:43

Relief - an update

  • Mood: cautiously relaxed

I want to thank everyone who wrote and commented on my post, offering encouragement and prayers. There are greatly appreciated and they are helping. My husband took some aggressive steps and he took care of me. He is so awesome.

We are now staying in one of those hotels where you pay by the week. It is small, but it is ours.

It has a kitchenette so I can cook. I have tried to make it as homey as possible. I still miss everyone back home, but I am surviving here. I am even finding happy spots during the days. My husband helps with that. I have had a couple of nights where I slept well. Other times not so much.

But for now I have some relief. I will continue to associate with the people who were cruel and I have already forgiven them. But trust is very hard for me and when someone violates my trust it isn't easily won back - if ever.

At this point, though, I can breathe and smile. I can relax.
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Saturday, August 3rd 2013

12:57

Shunned

  • Mood: depressed (I think)

Some days I wonder if Asperger's isn't some cruel joke.  I get shunned by so many people because of it.

I thought I had finally found a family - extended family (my mother is still alive) - who would love and accept me as I am. They talked a good game, acting like they liked me, like they wanted to understand Asperger's.

But in the end, I think most people are only out for what benefits them. They look at other people through their own self centered perceptions and don't try to understand.

I have been living in these people's home with my husband because we had nowhere else to go. These people acted like they liked me at first anyway. But then I felt the shift. They stopped talking to me and when they did talk to me their tone was clipped and loud at the end. I know that usually means that someone does not like you when they use that tone. People have explained that to me.

I have no idea what I did wrong. I had been trying to be kind and helpful when I knew what to do. Most of the time I just felt very awkward because I am in a house that isn't mine and I do not feel very comfortable doing a lot of things. I had been cooking for them, but they did not seem to like me doing that much. That was what I could think to do to help, but I don't think they wanted me doing that.

I tried to be kind to everyone, even when they weren't kind to me. And when the others would say something negative about one person I would try to say something positive about them because they weren't there to take up for themselves. I don't like talking bad about anyone, especially if they are not there to stand up for themselves.

But, as a social person I fail miserable and I really failed this time. Now they all don't like me. And I don't know why.

When I first felt that they did not like me, I stayed in my room a lot so give them space. That is what I do. When I know I am in a place where I am not wanted I withdraw. I become invisible. I hope that maybe if they don't see me then they aren't bothered with me and they will like me again.

I was wrong. This morning I overheard them talking about me. ALL of them! Even the one I thought still liked me! Then they all went to breakfast and left me there. They just announced they were going and left me there all alone like I was NOT a part of the family.

They showed me that I am NOT a part of their family. That really hurt. It hurt me to hear them talking about me and then to shun me that way. It was like they were making a point to let me know that I am not a part of their family.

I wish I could just go away but I can't. I have my husband and he still loves me. But he is all I have here. I don't have any friends, not even a pastor I can talk to - or feel comfortable talking to. I feel all alone. These people have turned on me and I have no idea why.

My husband says that Asperger's is hard because I look so normal. But they have been told. I don't understand why their hearts are so cold and hard against me. I have tried to be good. I have tried to be a friend. I have tried to fit in.

I tried to be a part of their family and now they don't want me. And I am alone again. And I don't even know what I did. I am so confused and afraid. How can people like you one minuted and not like you the next? I feel so uncomfortable here now. I have been crying most of the day because it hurts so badly. I never thought these people would turn on me like this. I never thought they would stop liking me.

Thank you, Asperger's, for making me an outcast again and again.

I am SO CONFUSED!!!! I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANY OF THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If God has His hand in this I sure wish He would show up because I feel despondent. I am so tired of this life. So very, very tired.



Image by: Master isolated images on freedigitalphotos.net
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Friday, April 26th 2013

6:30

Contentment

  • Mood: Content

Contentment

If you have read any of my books or have been following this blog for any amount of time, you know that I write quite a bit about contentment.

It is a simple concept, really, but so many people seem to struggle with it. I don’t really understand it because it is so simple, so easy. You just make up your mind to be content with what you have.

That’s the way it is for me anyway.

See, being content with what God has given you is a discipline. It isn’t much different from any other discipline. You have to work at it, stick with it and hone it until it is second nature.

I can tell you firsthand that there is nothing that compares to the peace that comes from true contentment. God said that He would give us, those who live for Him, what we need. He said He would never leave us nor forsake us.

This means that as long as we are plugged in to Jesus and trying our best to live for Him, He is going to make sure that our needs are met.

It is important, though, to understand the difference between what we need and what we want. Sometimes what we want is not what we need. In fact, I will take it a step even farther and say that sometimes getting the things that we want could destroy us.

And we have a wise, loving Father who knows this. He knows what is best for us and He wants what is best for us.

The stumbling block that many experience when it comes to contentment is actually trusting Him.

Do you trust God enough to turn your life over to Him and be content with Him plan for you? Do you trust that He knows what is best for you? Do you trust that He will give you all that you need (even if it isn’t all you want)?

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Tuesday, April 2nd 2013

19:08

Realization and Advice

  • Mood: A Little Sad

I realize that there are people who don't like me - even in my own family.
I realize that there are people who will never forgive me for things I have done - even in my own family.
And while it hurts, there is nothing I can do about it.

For an Aspie, that is a really, really hard thing to accept.

What many people don't understand about the typical Aspie is that we want everything to be "right." We want people to like us, especially the ones we like or love. We want to be forgiven. We want people to see that we have changed.

But to some people, some things are just too broken to fix and they will hold to their hate or bitterness or unforgiveness.

For an Aspie, it is hard to let go.

See, I know who much I have changed since I was filled with the Holy Spirit. I know that I am a completely different person and I am changing more and more every day. 

I know that God has forgiven me for the things I did before the Holy Ghost got ahold of me and that should be enough.

But it isn't.

I have people in my past, my own family even, who will always hold over my head that I did this or that. They will forever crucify me for things in the past over and over and over again. My regret, my apologies will never be enough. They will not be content until they see blood. They enjoy the punishment of their bitterness, their obvious contempt for me while they use me for their own gain.

And I just keep trying to bridge that gap; keep trying to get them to like me again. I just keep trying to get them to forgive me. I try over and over. I do things for them. I try to be as kind as I possibly can.

But you can't buy forgiveness and love - not through actions or words or even money.

Forgiveness and love need to come from the person withholding it.

I am just grateful that Jesus does not withhold forgiveness and love. I wish more people would try harder to be like Him. I try to be - so very, very hard.

So for today's Autism Awareness post I just ask you to please be aware of this tendency. If you have forgiven someone but haven't actually said it, don't take it for granted that they "just know" - they may not. And if they are an Aspie they  most likely do not know.

Aspies usually cannot "read" people. We often cannot tell if someone likes us or dislikes us unless it is blatantly expressed.

If you like someone, let them know.

Because for an Aspie, it can be agony.
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Monday, April 1st 2013

19:26

Autism Awareness Items - How do you Feel about Them?

  • Mood: Thoughtful
Since April is Autism Awareness Month, I thought I would try to take each day and post something related to autism awareness. I may not be able to do it every day this month, but I will try. I would like to see discussion on some of the autism and Asperger related issues that we deal with every day. This is the first post.

I was looking at some autism awareness items on the web today. It seems that there are a lot of things related to autism that are available out there. I was somewhat surprised. I am not a jewelry person, but I found these things are low key and mostly sensory friendly.

I would like to know your opinion on these items. Each picture is actually a link that will open in a new window if you want to see the descriptions of the items. Which do you like? Which do you not like?

How do you feel about autism awareness items that you display prominently (or somewhat prominently) on your person? Why do you feel that way?

Autism Awareness Bracelet
Autism Rubber Bracelet  *available to ship 5/13*
Autism Ribbon Keychain

Autism Awareness Keychain


Autism Ribbon Zipper Pull

Autism Zipper Pull


Autism Puzzle Heart Lapel Pin

Autism Heart Shaped Puzzle Pin

There are a lot of other things on the site, but these were the ones that caught my eye. What do you think?

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Monday, March 25th 2013

0:33

Beyond the Altar

  • Mood: Thoughtful

A few years ago, a woman approached the doors of a church. Her stomach twisted into knots as she opened the door. She was with a friend, but it made little difference. Her friend was “normal;” she was not. The smile on her face belied her anxiety and apprehension. Would these people accept her? Could she possibly fit in with them? These were her only thoughts as she found a seat.

She watched people talking with each other, walking past her. While a few stopped to shake her hand, most passed right on by - almost as if she wasn’t even there. Years of experience told her that she, in fact did NOT fit in, that she would not be accepted because she was too different, too strange, too odd (she had no understanding yet of the devil and his lies). They called it autism, but she thought of it more as the “don’t fit in disorder.” She sat on the outside of their social bubble and watched.

A few services later (she very rarely, if ever missed) she gathered the nerve to walk forward during altar call. She didn’t quite make it all the way to the front – it was just too much. She stood awkwardly on the fringes of the group, watching, alone, waiting for - what? Who would want to pray for her? She was such a sinner, nothing like these people who were so holy and who seemed to know how to pray. She watched, standing on the outside, just beyond the altar. And no one noticed.

That night, she went home and said to her friend, “I don’t belong, anywhere.”

Her friend started including her, drawing her in. Others in the church followed his lead and began reaching out to her. For a year she never quite made it to the altar, but a few people would step beyond the altar and come to her, reach out to her.

At the end of that year I received the Holy Ghost.

Fast forward several years. A young woman walks into a church. She is very quiet, reserved. It is easy to not see her, she rarely makes any noise. No one sees the struggle within her, but her mother cries out to God every night to save her little girl. He is leading her to this church, working in her, stirring her and a hunger is growing.

But she is unsure, apprehensive, shy and maybe even scared. There is so much she does not understand, so much she wants to know but can’t find the right questions. The words escape her. She listens though. Sometimes her head is down, but later she can explain what was taught.

She went to the Ladies Conference and something stirred her more. She was excited. No one could tell, but her mother could. There was something different in her spirit, something stirring, something hungry, something curious, something ignited.

The day after returning there is an altar call. She starts to get up, and then sits back down, unsure. Her mother nods, tells her it is OK. She walks toward the front but stops at the fringe of the altar. For several moments she waits, watches, standing awkwardly but no one notices her because she is beyond the altar.

That night she goes home and posts on FaceBook, “I don’t fit in...anywhere.”

This isn’t anyone’s fault – no one to blame, but we should be sensitive to the people with needs who are beyond the altar.

Because we rush to the altar so quickly, so readily, we just assume that everyone else is just like us.

But they are not.

We need to broaden our scope of vision. Yes, the people who come to the altar need prayer, but there are people who don’t quite make it there that still need something. There are people who stand on the fringe, just beyond the altar, shifting from foot to foot, feeling awkward and unsure. They long for someone to reach out, to draw them in and when it does not happen they automatically think that it is something wrong with them.

These people may not understand the love that God has for them. They may not understand that the sin they carry is the very reason they need to approach the altar and not a reason they are unable. They need to feel like they belong.

We should be drawing people in. Watch, observe, pay attention, listen – especially during altar call. They may not dress the way we do or look the way we do. They may not raise their hands or pray aloud. But everyone has to start somewhere.

It is God’s will that everyone – EVERYONE – be saved. Jesus met people where they were. He did not say that He would only heal them if they raised their hands in worship and dressed a certain way. He met them right where they were and let His love make the difference and start the changes.

Not everyone is bold. Not everyone knows that they can be bold. Some people believe that they do not deserve God’s love or healing or even to be embraced by the body.

We don’t know what people are carrying when they walk through those doors. Behind that smile may be a feeling of not belonging, of being a misfit.

But if they are brave enough to keep coming through those doors, we need to be committed enough to keep trying to draw them in – even those who stand awkwardly beyond the altar.

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Monday, February 25th 2013

17:03

A Way in the Darkness...

  • Mood: Grateful

I was fleeing an abusive relationship. I started 2,400 miles away from "home" (Louisiana - my parents' house). I had managed to get to Texas. It was midnight, I had two young children with me, no money and the low fuel light on the dash was blinking at me.

I had no idea what I was going to do.

I wasn't living for God. Sure, I tossed a prayer His way now and then. We didn't really have a "relationship" though. It was more like a "I'll call on you when I need you" sort of thing.

And I rarely thought I needed Him.

I was too blind - or too dumb - or both - to see how much He did in my life, how He moved, how He made everything happen.

But that is another story for another day.

I was leaving Montana after being in a horribly abusive, adulterous relationship. I was broken, exhausted and had no clue what I was going to do next. As I drove the 34 foot moving van (that I had loaded myself with stove, fridge, washer, dryer and all the furniture in my house) that was pulling my '81 Ford Bronco on a trailer, I began to believe I had bit off more than I could chew. My daughter and son, 10 and 8 respectively, sat in the cab of the truck with me. They had no idea that I had no idea what we were going to do and how we were going to complete our journey.

We were tapped out. No money for fuel or food. We had a few more miles and it would end. We would be stranded. The cell phone I had used for the trip had died the day before and I had not been able to recharge it (this was early on in the cell phone times - we weren't as sophisticated back then). 

But my family couldn't help anyway. They were living on a shoestring budget too.

I couldn't go back, though, so I pressed forward, my headlights cutting the darkness to only reveal more darkness. My hope was fading quickly.

I chose this time to toss up one of those prayers to God, though. "God," I said, "If you are really there; if you really hear me, I could sure use some help right about now. I know I am just coming to you like this out of the blue and it's kinda weird, but I really need some help and you are the only one I can think of to call on."

Good thing God doesn't require flattery or ego boosts. I pretty much told Him that He was my last hope - and He was.

Not long after that, I pulled off the interstate to stop at a fuel station. Wasn't sure what I was going to do there, but I just felt like I needed to stop. The sign was deceptive though. I did not find a fuel station at the exit (as the sign said I would). Instead it was more pitch black darkness. It might as well have been nothingness I thought as a sighed hopelessly. I slowed and swung out a little to make a U-turn.

I heard honking but did not feel anything. When I looked in my rearview mirror though, I saw that a woman had run into my trailer. She got out and was yelling at me. I just sat and let her yell. I was too defeated, too tired, to hopeless to even say more than "I'm sorry."

Apparently, though I had not swung out far, it was far enough for her to think I was changing lanes and she did not see my blinker. She tried to pass me on the left and ran smack into my trailer - and she was hopping mad at me.

She calmed down later and we actually talked. She apologized for yelling at me. I told her it was OK.

The police came. I got a ticket because my wheels were just over the line - barely, the police officer said. He said he did not want to give me the ticket, but his sergeant said he had to.

He asked me where I was coming from. I told him. He asked where I was going. I told him. He went about his business.

When everyone had gone, though, he told me to follow him. He said he was going to show me how to get back on the interstate.

First, though, he led me to a convenience store where he put fuel in my truck and bought food and drinks for my kids and me. Then he opened his wallet and gave me $200 saying, "I wish I had more to give you."

I will never, ever forget that night. 

He got us back on the interstate and we made it to my parents' home without further incident, arriving in the late morning.

I will never, ever forget that night. It was one of the times that I can look back and know I felt God moving although I was too ignorant to recognize it. But it lets me know that He has been there for me all along, through my mess ups, my blinding errors and now as I live for Him, through my mess ups and blinding errors. He holds me close and gives me these wonderful testimonies to share with others so that they can come to know Him. Though a lot of water has passed under that bridge, I can see God's hand in so many times in my life when I felt alone and abandoned. I never was.

But that one night has stayed with me. That one time I cried out to God in my blundering, unbelieving way and He showed me a love that was bigger than I could ever imagine. It took me years to piece it all together, to see just what He did and how He can use the most dire times of our life to make the biggest, brightest miracles.

Certainly He knew that I would come to Him, would one day live for Him, but I don't think that was why He answered my desperate prayer. I think He just wanted me to know that He was there and that He could move in ANY situation, even the most dire and depressing.

He made a way for a lost woman, knowing (I believe in my heart) that it would be years before she would be "found" and come to Him. Yet He still provided a way in the darkness...

 

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